Secret Love Since 13
by JustLikeBrookeDavis
Summary: Brooke has kept a secret from Peyton since they were 13 and Nathan and Haley know what it is and help her through the hard times...Sucky summary I know but it's late and I'm tired
1. Intro

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**Secret Love Since 13 **

**Introductions**

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**Brooke: ****My name is Brooke Davis and I am 17 years old. My best friends are Peyton, Nathan and Haley. I have known Peyton and Nathan since I was about 7 years old, and Haley since we were 12. All of us are juniors and High school and in the popular crowd. You see Nathan is the caption on the basketball team and I am head cheerleader, Haley and Peyton are also cheerleaders. Everyone at school thinks they know who I am but in reality they don't know me at all they know the fake me. They know the popular girl everyone wants to be with or be, but the real me has some really fucked up issues. My home life has been hell pretty much my whole life. My parents started abusing me when I was 8 years old and when it got to the point where I withdrew from everyone and locked myself in my room my parents weren't having any of that. So they sent me to therapy when I was 9 and I still go every week and she makes me write in a journal and she reads the entrees. I usually don't hide anything from Nathan, Haley or Peyton…But the truth is I can never tell Peyton something about my life but go I wish I could. I realized I was into girls at the age of 13 and that I fell in love with Peyton…I had no clue how to deal with this so I turned to drinking Nate and Hales caught on to my drinking problem after about a month Peyton was a little too busy flirting with every god damn person in the world and they helped me and they still do. I just wish Peyton would realize that I love her and don't just want to sleep with her. **

**Peyton: ****My name is Peyton Sawyer and I am 17 years old. My best friends are Brooke, Nathan and Haley. I have known Brooke and Nathan since I was about 7 years old, and Haley since we were 12. All of us are juniors and High school and in the popular crowd. You see Nathan is the caption on the basketball team and all three of us girls are cheerleaders except Brooke is the head cheerleader. Let's see some people might call me the school slut because I flirt with everyone I see including girls and have no problem dancing and making out with them at all. Even though people say this about me I don't pay any attention to it because I have my friends and that all I need right? I feel really lucky to know that Brooke trust me with her life because I am one of three people who know the real Brooke Davis not the one she shows at school…The one who isn't perfect and as been through hell more times than you can count but continues to stay strong, the one who has a journal and turns to drinking when she has a problem because hates to admit she needs help. The one who goes to therapy every week and has since she was 9 years old, and even though I know all this I still love her to death. **

**Haley and Nathan: ****Our names are Haley James Scott and Nathan Scott we are 17 years old. Our best friends are Peyton, and Brooke. Nate's known them since they were 7 and I have known them since we were 12. All of us are juniors and High school and in the popular crowd. You see Nathan is the caption on the basketball team and we three girls are cheerleaders but Brooke is the head cheerleader. Nathan and I got married last year when we were 16 years old and after he got emancipated from his parents. Since Nathan and I have been 13 we have been quite busy helping Brooke out with something major in her life which Peyton doesn't know about and you might think that's weird but you won't when you find out what it is. When Brooke was thirteen she figured out that she was into girls and in love with Peyton she couldn't deal with what she realized so she turned to drinking after about a month Nathan and I caught on to her problem and asked her about it and why she was drinking so much and she started sobbing while she was explaining it to us. To this day we still help her a lot and we know she is hurting because Peyton is a huge flirt and makes out with girls and guys and flirts with them and could care less. If she just opened her eyes maybe she would see that Brooke loves her for who she is. Brooke is not the girl that she appears to be to everyone and luckily she doesn't hide the real Brooke Davis from us. Everyone thinks she has this perfect life but that's not true at all. Brooke's parents started abusing her when she was 8 years old and when she was 9 they put her in therapy because they didn't want their kid to be anti-social and closed off. Her therapist who she still sees every week has her write in a journal and shows it to her. Brooke doesn't have to show it to anyone else but she has shown me a couple of pages in there and I feel privileged because I'm the only one besides her and her therapist that has read it.**

**A/N: ****Okay well this is an introduction to my new story well explaining a little about the characters and how they are all involved with Brooke. Please let me know what you think about it on what you see here. I also did this because I'm testing to see if something shows up when you upload your chapters.**


	2. The Party

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**Secret Love Since 13 **

**Chapter 1: The party**

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**Peyton's POV: **

Brooke and I are in my room getting ready to go to this extremely amazing party that is being thrown at Nathan's beach house tonight. I'm a little bit concerned about bringing Brooke to the party tonight though because she has been acting distant and weird for a couple of weeks now and I know Brooke tends to drink when her life gets difficult. Maybe I should explain a little bit about Brooke so you would understand her, a little better. Brooke may be the most popular kid in school, head cheerleader and the girl all the guys want to date and the other girls want to be. To the outside world her life may seem perfect but it is far from it, and only Haley Nathan and I know about this. Brooke's home life is unstable and has been hell for her ever since she was a little kid. Although her mom and dad are home and they make it seem like they really care about their daughter they don't. You see in reality Brooke's parent's abuse her a lot and have since she was about 8 years old. She used to come to school with little bruises on her arms and I would ask her about them and she would always say she fell…Until one day when we were 10 and Brooke came over to my house crying and she has a black eye and a lot of bruises on her arms. I asked what happened and she explained that her dad was pissed off that she was an hour late coming home and he just went crazy, but that wasn't the worse I have seen her. Brooke started locking herself in her room and not talking to anyone so her parents decided that no child of theirs was going to be anti-social so they sent her to a therapist and she still goes every week to this day she also writes in a journal because her therapist thinks it will help her let her emotions out instead of drinking but it usually doesn't even though I've never read the journal I do know she writes in it because I see her doing it constantly, well I hope that explains a little bit about her and why I'm concerned. Anyways right now Brooke is sitting on my bed waiting for me to finish getting ready so we can leave. Brooke is wearing jeans and a hot pink halter top. I'm wearing skinny jeans and a tank top. While I finish with my makeup I start talking to Brooke to make sure she is okay.

"Hey Brooke is everything okay with you?" I ask very concerned

"Yeah of course Peyton" She answers keeping her eyes to the ground trying to avoid letting me know something really is bothering her

"Sweetie we have known each other forever so I know that you everything isn't fine" I explain to her while I sit down on the bed next to her trying to get her to tell me what's wrong. Even though Brooke and I are best friends and she trust me completely it still takes awhile for her to open up to me and let me see her vulnerable.

"Peyton I promise you that I am fine can we please just got to the party we are already 45 minutes late" She says trying to avoid this conversation

"Yeah of course we can, let's go" I say as we both get up and head out the door.

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Brooke and I arrived at Nathan's beach house and saw a whole bunch of people outside the house next to the bonfire talking and drinking. We make are way into the house and right away Brooke goes over to the table with all the alcohol and pours herself a drink and I need to remember to keep an eye on her. I'm not the only one that saw Brooke over at the table and within ten minutes of being there she has already had three drinks. Haley and Nathan walk over towards me and they look really concerned about Brooke as well.

"Hey Peyton is everything okay with Brooke?" Haley asks

"Hey Hales I honestly don't know…she won't talk to me when we were in my room getting ready she was distant and she has been like that for the past couple of weeks." I explain

"Do you guys think it's a good idea that Brooke is here then if there is something wrong that she is hiding?" Asks a worried Nathan

"Honestly no I don't but you know Brooke you can't exactly deny her of going to a great party" I explain

"Peyton is totally right Nathan" Just as Haley finishes her sentence Brooke comes walking over with yet another drink.

"What is Peyton right about?" Slurs Brooke

"Oh nothing sweetie, but Brooke don't you think that maybe you shouldn't drink anymore? You have been here what fifteen minutes and already had five drinks." Haley says

"No trust me Haley I am totally fine" She slurs even more

"Well I'll see you guys later I am going to go mingle with other people" I tell them

"Okay have fun" Says Nathan

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**Brooke's POV: **

We have been at the party for about a half hour now and I have been drinking none stop and I know Haley and Peyton are really worried about me. Haley hasn't left my side since Peyton and I basically got here. Once Haley was positive Peyton was out of earshot and site she started asking me questions.

"Brooke sweetie what's going on with you? Has something happened with your parents?" Haley asks really concerned

"No, Haley I'm fine nothing happen and nothing is going on" I slur as I walk away from her

I head over to the table get yet another drink, but this time I grab a beer just for something different. I'm walking around the room it's been about an hour since we arrived at the party. I am standing by the wall just watching everyone dancing. All of a sudden my attention is drawn to two females who are grinding up against each other, and then I realize that the two girls are Peyton and Rachel. My heart started to break because no one knows this except for Haley and Nathan because I need someone to talk to about this and they were there but I'm into girls and in love with Peyton and have been since I was 13 years old. I continue to watch not realizing that Haley and Nathan have managed to move their way next to me as soon as they saw what was going on. Now not only are they grinding up against each other they are making out and Rachel's hand moves down in between Peyton's legs and starts rubbing her and it get's everyone's attention. The room got so quite once everyone saw what was going on between the two of them. Peyton isn't so stubble most of the time so because it was so quite you could hear Peyton moan "oh god Rach". Right as Haley was about to say something into my ear I drop the beer bottle that I had in my hand and I started hyperventilating. All of a sudden Peyton pulls away from Rachel and starts walking over towards me once she realizes that I am hyperventilating and I was the one who dropped the beer bottle. Before Peyton could get to me Nathan stopped her.

"Nate move I need to go see if Brooke is okay" I hear Peyton say

"Peyton it's okay Haley is with her right now why don't we go for a walk just me and you at the beach so you can calm down while Haley tries to get Brooke calm and to tell her what's wrong" I hear Nathan say

"Fine but I don't like this idea Nate" Peyton says

"I know" with that said they walk out of the house.

Haley takes my hand and leads me up the stairs into the master bedroom where she knew no one would be and locked the door, I am still hyperventilating but I'm also crying so that makes it even worse. I walk over to the bed and sit down

"Hey sweetie can you please try and calm down?" I hear Haley ask while she rubs my back

"T-this isn't fair, how come she flirts and makes out with everyone it seems like except for the one person that truly loves her?" I ask Haley while still crying but my breathing has gotten back to normal.

"Brooke I honestly wish I had an answer for you" She says

"It's okay Haley I just have to get used to the fact that she is never going to love me back hell no one is ever going to love me…Who is going to love someone who gets beaten by her parents daily who has to go to a therapist because of all the shit she's been through? I can tell you NO ONE!" I tell her while moving up to the head board of the bed and hug my knees.

"Hey now come on, do you really believe that Brooke? Because I don't how can anyone not love you? You're amazingly kind and caring you put everyone before you, your beautiful…and just a wonderfully amazing person" she says  
"Yeah then why was Peyton practically FUCKING Rachel on the dance floor not giving a damn who was watching…Why isn't she in here right now trying to figure out what's wrong? WHY am I not enough???

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**Peyton's POV: **

So about five minutes ago I was inside at Nathan's beach party and I was having a really good time. I was pretty much having sex on the dance floor. Rachel and I were grinding up against each other and making out she was also rubbing between my legs. I couldn't help it but moan it felt so damn good. But I pulled away from her because I could see that Brooke was hyperventilating and that the beer bottle that I heard drop was hers. I started to head over towards her but Nate stopped me and wouldn't let me go to her. He forced me to go for a walk with him so that is why I am out walking along the beach with him, instead of inside with my best friend when she needs me.

"Nathan what the fuck am I doing out here? I NEED to go see if Brooke is okay." I ask him really pissed off

"Calm down Peyton…you are out here so you can calm down…You were getting pretty worked up with Rachel in there and we all know where that tends to lead." Nathan says

"But Brooke is in there hyperventilating and crying and I'm out here for a stupid reason it's not fair. Now can I please go back inside Nate, so I can talk to her?" I say angrily

"Not just yet, Peyton I have a question for you and I want the complete truth…Do you feel attracted to any of the people you flirt, kiss, dance, have sex with?" He asks

"Honestly…Not really I just feel in control when I do it and it's not harming me or anyone else so it's not a problem" I reply

"So you think" I hear him mutter

"Nate I don't get how it's a problem if it's not hurting anyone" I say

"Peyton have you ever thought that maybe someone does love you…and by doing this every night you are hurting them?" He asks me

"What? Nate do you know something you are not telling me?" I ask wondering

"No…I just want you to think about it because just because you don't know if anyone likes you doesn't mean no one does and that you're not hurting them." He says then walks back in the direction of the beach house

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**Haley's POV: **

I'm sitting here in the master bedroom of Nathan's beach house while there is a party going on with Brooke crying in hysterics because of what just happened. See we were down stairs at the party enjoying it Brooke a little too much she was drinking way too much for Peyton, Nathan, and Me. Peyton went to mingle with other people and Brooke was standing by a wall with a beer in her hand and she was watching the love of her life practically having sex with Rachel on the dance floor and making out. You could see Rachel rubbing Peyton between the legs and it was so quite you heard her moan "Oh God Rach" next thing I know Brooke drops the beer bottle in her hand and starts hyperventilating. Nathan and I are the only ones that no Brooke is into girls and in love with Peyton, so when she tried to come over and see what was going on Nate stopped her and lead her outside. So that is why we are in this room and I'm listening to the heart retching cries of my friend right now.

"Brooke sweetie just says everything that is on your mind please…tell me everything that's bugging you at this moment because I know for a fact that there was something wrong when you showed up tonight that you haven't told anyone and since you've been distant for weeks I'm guessing not even your therapist knows what's going on right?" I tell and ask her

"Y-yeah…b-but I c-can't tell you guys it's gotten so bad." She says in between sobs

"Brooke you're really freaking me out talking like that…Brooke you know you can trust me with whatever you say." I tell her in all honestly

"Hales do you think you can go get me some of Nate's things my clothes are too tight and hurt and I can't go hone or to Peyton's right now" She cries out but as soon as she says all this she realizes what she said and tries to back out of it

"You know what never mind forget I said anything I'm fine…I think I'm just going to go." She says still crying

"No you don't Brooke…I'll be back with a pair of Nate's boxers and a shirt" I tell her as I head to the door knowing not only am I bring that stuff up with me but Peyton and Nate have to here this too.

I head out of the bedroom and I literally race down the stairs in order to find Nate and Peyton hoping to god that they are back from their walk. As soon as I get down stairs I see both of them walking in and I race towards them.

"Wow Hale's slow down what's wrong? Where are you going?" I hear Nate ask

"Is something wrong with Brooke?" Peyton asks

"Brooke told me she couldn't tell me what was going on but then she asked if I could get some of Nate's clothes because hers are too tight and hurt and she can't go home right now…Guys I'm really worried she also said that her therapist doesn't even know what's going on. Since when does she hide anything from her? I'm really worried" I tell them really fast

"Okay Hales I'll go get some clothes for her you two go up there and I'll be there in a minute." Nate tells us

"Okay" We both say as we head up the stairs to Brooke

Both Peyton and I walk into the guest bedroom and Brooke's back is turned to us. So she doesn't know that anyone has walked into the room. So we walk over to the bed and I gently put my hand on Brooke's shoulder she jumps and cries "Please don't daddy" as soon as I heard this I turn towards Peyton and we both have this look on our face's because we know this has to be bad. Peyton and I walk over to the other side of the bed and Brooke's eyes are shut really tightly and she has tears streaming down her cheeks. Peyton puts her hand on one of Brooke's legs and starts shacking her hoping she will open her eyes but she just screams at the top of her lungs "Daddy don't not again" at this I speak up.

"Baby its Haley and Peyton please open your eyes we need you to tell us what your dads doing" When I say that her eyes snap open in terror

"W-what are you talking about h-he's not doing anything" She stutters

"Brookie come on please tell us" as soon as Peyton was done talking we hear the door opening and we think Brooke forgot where she is because when the door opened her eyes were shut really tightly again

"Make him leave please just make him stop" we hear Brooke say and Nathan look's at us really puzzled

"Brooke it's not your dad it's just Nathan he has the clothes for you, you aren't even at your house. You're at Nate's beach house" I explain

Brooke takes the clothes but her hands are shacking so much that she is unable to get her clothes off. She is struggling so much that I help her because I can't bear to watch this sight anymore and hell I've undressed her before so it's not like it is the first time. I start lifting her shirt up over her head and as I'm move it above her stomach I stop and see a bunch of bruises were she's been punched and kicked and all three of us just gasp as I run my fingers over the bruises lightly. Brooke just starts crying I quickly finish taking her shirt off and putting Nate's shirt on her. I move on to take her pants of I start to unbutton them but then she starts squirming around saying "no, stop, please don't touch me" with those words said I stop what I was doing and I automatically know what's been going on.

"Brooke sweetie how long has your dad been touching you?" I ask

"WHAT?" Peyton and Nathan screech

"I-I'm S-sorry" is all we hear Brooke say

Peyton kneels down in front of Brooke so she can see her eyes and starts talking "Baby look at me you have NOTHING and I mean NOTHING to be sorry for…"

"Bee you know that we have to tell someone about this right?" I hear Nathan ask her

"NO" she screams afraid of being taken out of her home and away from the only people that love her she tries to back out of this as well "I'm s-sorry that what I said m-made you think my d-dad is t-touching me b-but he's not, so no need to tell" She says very quietly

Lately Brooke has been shying away from contact from people but mostly guys and I guess now we know why. Nate goes and sits on the bed and reaches out to brush hair out of her face but she yelps and moves away from his hand.

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**Brooke's POV: **

"Please can we just forget about all of this tonight I am really tired and all I want to do is go to sleep?" I ask them

"We can't just forget about the information we have found out Brooke and you know that…But sweetie we can stop talking about it and get you back to Peyton's so you can go to sleep." I hear Haley say

"C-can I just stay here? I can't move and really don't want to face everyone when I freaked out down stairs" I ask and explain

"Of course you can Brooke you know that" Nate says "How about all three of you guys take this room and I'll sleep in my room" Nate says

"Its fine Hales can sleep with you I'll be fine with Peyt" I say quietly

"Brooke it's not a problem besides I think you need all the comfort you can get so I'm staying." Haley says

With that said Nate kisses the top of my head and kiss Haley goodnight and leaves the room. Hales finish taking my pants off while I'm still shacking. We get into the bed and I'm in the middle of my best friends but yet I'm still scared because it always happens at night. I get up and go shut and lock the door then get back into the bed and snuggle in as close to Peyton as possible and I begin to cry. I'm pretty sure both of them can hear me because Peyton if whispering sweat reassuring things in my ear while Haley is rubbing soothing circles on my back. I don't know how long it took me to fall asleep all I know is that I cried myself to sleep like I usually do now a days.

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**A/N: So there you guys have it the first real chapter to this story. I hope you guys like it I added a lot of things happening to Brooke because I wanted her to be in a dark place and have her friends help her out of it…Question how do you guys want Peyton to find out about Brooke being in love with her? **

**Nathan gives Peyton Brooke journal and tells her to read it because he can't watch Peyton hurt Brooke this much anymore**

**Nate just flat out tells her**

**Haley tells her**

**Peyton finds Brooke's journal open while she is sleeping open and it catches her eyes so she read it**

**Please let me know or if you have other ideas. And please don't be afraid to tell me what you hated about my story and how I can improve on it.**


	3. You Weren't Supposed To Find Out

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**Secret Love Since 13 **

**Chapter 2: You weren't Supposed To Find Out**

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**Peyton's POV: **

It's around 9:30 in the morning and I just woke up. For a moment I totally forgot where I was but then remembered everything that happened last night with Brooke. Look down to see that Brooke is snuggled up as close to me as possible and has a death grip on me. I look over to the other side of Brooke and see that Hales is awake and just looking at Brooke with a very concerned look on her face. I'm pretty sure I probably have the same look on my face as she does. Suddenly we hear someone trying to open the door and I know that it's Nathan. Hale's goes to let him in and Brooke wakes up very frightened because she heard someone trying to open the door.

"No please don't open the door" I hear Brooke mumble into my chest as she still is holding onto me for dear life

"Sweetie it's just Nate…and all three of us want to talk to you so we got to open the door" Haley tells her

"O-okay" She says nervously

"Brooke sweetie about last night, we really need you to tell us the truth" I say

"Peyt I have told you the truth my dad isn't doing anything to me" She says getting teary eyed

"If he isn't doing anything than who is? Because you have bruises all over your stomach, so we know someone is doing something to you" Nathan says

"I-I d-don't w-want to talk about this anymore" She stutters while crying

"Sweetie I promise you that none of us are going to tell anyone what's going on until you let us…But I do need you to tell us what is happening so that we can protect you from it" Haley says while rubbing her back

"Y-you can't protect me from it you just can't" She says sobbing now

"Baby please…Let us in you've let us in before we just need you to do it again…and we can protect you but in order for us to do that we need to know what is happening" I say

"What time is it? I have therapy today and can't be late or my therapist will be pissed" She says trying to avoid the subject but we all know it's also the truth

"It's 10:15, so I think we should let you get home and go to therapy but I want to see you after I need to talk to you about a couple of things" Haley tells her

"O-okay but Hale's do you think you could actually come with me today? I don't really want to go but have to and I just…never mind" She whispers

"Of course I'll go with you Brooke, come on let's go to your house then head over there" Haley says

"Okay" She reply's

"Bye you guys I'll talk to you later" Haley says

***~*~***

**Haley's POV: **

Brooke and I just walked out of Nathan's beach house and are on our way to Brooke's so she can get ready for her therapy session. I think all of us were surprised when she asked if I would go with her but it isn't the first time I have gone with her. Once we are at Brooke's house we head up to her room and I thank god that her parents aren't home because who knows what they would do knowing she didn't come home last night or even call to tell them where she was. Once Brooke is dressed she starts heading out of her room and I start to follow but then I see her journal on the side table of her bed and I know that she is supposed to bring it every week so her therapist knows what's been going on because half the time she won't talk. So I grab it and put it into my purse to make sure I give it to her before we enter the office. Once we get to her therapists office and she opens the door for us I think she was really surprised to see that I was here with Brooke again, because the last time I was here with her was the day after she was rushed to the hospital because of how much she had drank. Her therapist welcomes us in and then starts talking once we all sit down. Brooke immediately lays her head on my shoulder for comfort.

"Hey Brooke, Haley it's nice to see you again" Cheska tells us

"It's nice to see you too Cheska" I say back

"Hi" is all Brooke managed to say

"So Brooke how has your week been" Cheska asks her

"Oh well you know it's been fantastic" She says sarcastically

"I see I'm not going to get an answer to that question so I'll try another one. How are things with Peyton?" As soon as Cheska asks this Brooke's eyes start to form tears in them

"U-Um t-there good she's one of my best friends" Brooke says while the tears fall down her face this is when I speak up but Brooke knows that I always will

"Actually there was an incident yesterday involving Peyton" I tell Cheska while rubbing Brooke's back

"Oh really Brooke do you care to share what it was? If you don't I'm sure Haley will" Cheska says

"N-not really" Brooke says looking everywhere but Cheska and me

"Okay then I guess I will, and Brooke you can be mad at me if you want but you can't keep your emotions inside and keep drinking the way you have been for the past couple of weeks. So last night we were at a party and Brooke was drinking a lot and being distant but that's another problem anyways she had like 5 drinks then moved on to her 6th but that was a beer. She was by a wall and looking at the dance floor and saw Peyton and this girl Rachel grinding up against each other they were also making out and Rachel was rubbing her between the legs everyone was paying attention to them Peyton moaned which everyone heard because it was so quite well Brooke dropped her beer bottle and started to hyperventilate. I didn't really get her to talk a lot about this we had other problems too" While I was saying all of this Brooke managed to move her whole body so her back was facing Cheska and she was sobbing into my chest

"Brooke what were you feeling when you watched what Peyton was doing?" Cheska asks very concerned about her because she has known Brooke for so long and the older she got the more she closed every one out

"T-that I-it's pathetic to think that Peyton or anyone for that matter could love me the way I love Peyton. I mean why the fuck would they? No one really knows me except for Haley, Nathan and Peyton. If people knew all the shit I went through on a daily basis I know for a fact they would just feel sorry for pathetic me" Brooke says while crying and turned back around to face Cheska but never looked at her

"Honestly Brooke I think we go through this every week you aren't pathetic and there are a tons of people that love you for you. Anyways we have about 45 minutes left so I think this is a good time for me to see your journal and we can talk about what you have written in their" When Cheska says this Brooke's face just turned to a worried look both of us not knowing why

"Yeah about that I kind of forgot it at my house since I didn't spend the night there and I was in a rush to get ready and to get here" Brooke says

"Brooke you have forgotten your journal for the past 3 weeks now and I can't help but think you are leaving it at your house on purpose" Cheska says

"No I'm not" Brooke lies and both of us know this

"Well while I was walking out of your house Brooke I saw it and grabbed it" I tell her grabbing it out of my purse and about to hand it to Cheska

"Fuck" Brooke whispers "No you can't read that please can I just have it back? I promise I'll buy a new one that I'll bring every week just please don't read this one" Brooke's in tears begging and I'm pretty sure she knows that since she is so desperate to have her not read it that she is going to

"I'm really sorry sweetie but since I have it in my hands I'm going to read the things you've written in the past 3 weeks" Cheska says as sweetly as possible and starts to read them out loud

_4/7_

_Last night was hell I can't believe he's doing this to me. I could handle the hitting since I'm so used to it by now but this just makes me want to die even more then I already did. He came into my room and pulled the covers off of me and told me not to say a word I couldn't move once I realized what he was doing. He sat on my bed touching me for a fucking half hour before he left my room. God where the fuck was my mother? Why the hell does she let this shit happen to me I should just kill myself that way they wouldn't have to deal with me._

Both Cheska and I look at Brooke and she is now sitting up with her knees pulled up as tightly to her body as possible and she is crying really hard I just scoot closer to her while Cheska reads the next weeks entrée

_4/15_

_Last night was worse the last week. Not only was he touching me but he forced me to touch him too. I couldn't believe he was doing this to his own fucking daughter. I can't even tell anyone about this for so many damn reasons. For starts he told me if he found out that I told anyone I would regret it so bad he wouldn't just beat me but he would make sure I ended up in the hospital. Nobody would believe me anyways so I don't see the fucking point in even try to tell them. I can barley live like this anymore I spend every day thinking of ways to kill myself hoping one day I will get the courage to do s. I am being so distant from all my friends but that's because I don't feel like I deserve them and I will just screw up their lives and they would be better off if I wasn't here_

Cheska just looks at the girl who is sobbing in my arms. I feel really bad for Brooke, she shouldn't have to be going through this shit. Brooke watches Cheska turn the page and she starts going ballistic trying to stop her from what is on that page.

"NO…I gave in and let you read the first two pages but I refuse to let you read this page" Brooke shouts

I look down at her and move some hair away from her face and ask her a question very calmly and with a concerned motherly tone I know Brooke is so used to by now "Sweetie was is so bad that you don't want us to know about? You know she is only here to help and she can't do that unless she knows what's going on with you"

"Brooke I'm really sorry but by the way you are acting it tells me that this is something really important that I need to know" Cheska says sweetly and with that she reads the last entrée

_4/22_

_I couldn't take the beatings and touching anymore that today while I was home alone I tried to kill myself…I'm so damn pissed off at the fact that it didn't work. Maybe next time I should just chug my whole pill bottle with vodka that would definitely do the trick to bad Haley just walked in the door or else I would be heading to the bathroom and kitchen this very second._

We both just stare and Brooke who is starting to have a panic attack and I caught it right at the beginning so I was able to stop it right away.

"Brooke sweetie just take nice slow deep breathes for me" I say sweetly while rubbing her back

"I'm fine…Look at that my times up I guess I'll see you next week Cheska" Brooke says with a huge smile on her face until Cheska started talking

"Actually Brooke we aren't done talking especially since I just found out a couple of huge things that have been happening. But if Haley has to go that's fine I'll just keep you and I'll drive you home or to where they decide you need to be" Cheska says worriedly

"What the FUCK are you talking about? "Were they think I might need to be" And if Haley goes I go" Brooke says very angrily now because she really wanted to keep everything that was written in the past 3 weeks to herself

"Brooke I'm not going anywhere" I tell her

"Now Brooke which issue would you like to start off with? Your dad or your suicide attempt" Cheska asked her

"NONE…You weren't even supposed to know about that stuff…" Brooke says angrily

"Brooke I needed to know about these things…You know I am going to have to report what you dads been doing to cps and I also have to take you in for a phyc evaluations so they can make sure you're not a danger to yourself right?" Cheska asks her

"NO…Fuck you…Fuck this…I'm out of here" With that said Brooke ran out of the office building so fast and I know that there is no way on stopping Brooke when she get's something in her mind.

"Haley do you know were Brooke might be going? I hate doing this to her but it is the rules and it's for her safety. I know I'm her therapist but Brooke has been with me longer than anyone else and I feel like she needs me to protect her like she is my daughter" Cheska explains

"I know you are only doing your job…I also know that's why she didn't bring her journal with her I was kind of figuring that something like this was the reason because I found out about the abuse last night by pure accident. I have no clue where Brooke would be going she doesn't really share any of her hiding or thinking spots with anyone…Well Nathan and Peyton know of two different ones because they have followed her before" I explain to Cheska

"Do you think you could call them and have them go looking in those spots for us? And if one manages to find her can you tell them to either bring her back here or to the hospital and then call us so we can meet them there?" Cheska asks

"Yeah of course I can" I tell her

I get my phone out of my pocket and called Nathan first and explained a little bit of what's going on.

"Hello" Nathan says

"Hey Nate" I say

"What's up?" He asks

"Well we were at Brooke's therapist and we found out something's she didn't want us to and her therapist has to report both of them and Brooke didn't like that fact so she kind of ran out of here, and I know that you know one of the places she goes to when she is hiding or needs space so I was wondering if you could go check for us and if she is there either bring her back here or to the hospital and call me so we can meet you there" I explain to him

"Okay Haley's" he says then hangs up

Next I call Peyton knowing she will do anything for Brooke and that she would drop whatever she is doing and go looking for her.

"Hey" Peyton answers her phone

"Hey Peyt" I say

"What's up" she asks

"Well as you know we were at Brooke's therapist and while we were talking we found out something's she has been hiding from us and her therapist has to report both of those things. When she informed Brooke about this she didn't like that one bit and ran out of here so fast. I know that you know one of the spots she goes to when she is hiding or upset and was wondering if you could check there for us and if she is there either bring her back here or to the hospital and call me so we can meet you there" I explain

"Of course I will Haley…I will hopefully be talking to you soon bye" She says

Once we hang up I just sit in Brooke's therapists office and it is really quite because we have no clue what to say to each other although I know she wants to ask me about Brooke and how she has been acting lately but I think she has decided against it.

***~*~***

**Brooke's POV:**

Fuck I can't believe they found about the two most important things that I knew I had to keep a secret. I have no clue what I am going to do now. I don't want her to report these to the police and I don't want an evaluation I've been through too many of those before and ugh. So here I am running as fast as I can away from my therapist and Haley. I know Haley won't go after me because she has no clue where I go but I have a feeling she will tell Nathan and Peyton and they both know about a spot well I'm pretty sure Peyton knows about two of them but I've only caught her following me at one of them. So I am going to go to the one I'm not sure if Peyton knows about or not just to be on the safe side. I can't deal with all of this today. Once I get to my designated spot which is underneath the bridge I sit there and pull out the bottle of pills I had in my bag and the razor that no one knows I carry with me. I take the pills out of the bottle and swallow them then take the razor and cut my wrist…Just wanting all the pain and fear to go away. I start to feel dizzy from the pills and blood loss and the last thing I remember is dropping the razor on the ground.

***~*~***

**Nathan's POV:**

As soon as I was off the phone with Haley I got into my car and started to drive to the place that I followed Brooke to one day when she didn't like what was going on hoping that I would find her there because I have no clue what they found out about her but if they have to report it then it must me really bad. Ten minutes later I am at the school and you might be thinking why the hell would she go to the school know one likes being there when they don't have to be. But that was Brooke's point when I brought this up she said that it makes it harder for people to find her because they would never suspect her to be on the roof of the school. So I head up the latter and once I get on to the roof I realize that Brooke is not here. I just really hope that Peyton has better luck in finding her then I do. I better call Haley and let her know that Brooke is not here.

"Hey Nate did you find her?" Haley asks me

"Nope I didn't I'm sorry baby" I tell her

"That's okay if Peyton finds her we are just going to have them go to the hospital we can do both things at the same time that way." Haley informs me

"Okay I'll be there in about a half hour" I say before I hang up

I'm really worried about Brooke and I'm thinking about all the trouble she can get herself into when she is this upset because from the way Haley was talking she was fuming mad.

***~*~***

**Peyton's POV:**

Once I got off the phone with Haley I got into my car and I started to drive. Haley, Nathan and Brooke only know that I know of one spot where Brooke goes but the truth is I actually know two places. The second time I followed her I was more sneaky and I don't think I got caught. So knowing Brooke she is at the place she doesn't know I know about which is underneath the bridge. As I'm driving there I'm thinking to myself on why she goes down there she said that it's a good hide away because no one would think that someone would go underneath a bridge…Which if you think about it is the truth. So I pull my car up on the side of the bridge then I walk down underneath it and the sight I saw scared the living shit out of me. Brooke was lying on her back with a razor next her and pill bottle and her wrist bleeding. I immediately run to her and start talking to her hoping she is still capable of that.

"Brooke sweetie can you hear me?" I ask her

"Peyton" she barley whispers

"Yeah baby it's me" I answer

"I-I'm s-sorry" she says while her eyes are fighting to stay open

""Sweetie I need you to stay awake ok?" I ask and tell her while playing with her hair

""I-I c-can't I f-feel d-dizzy and very w-weak" after that sentence her eyes shut and I know I have to get her to the hospital

I pick up my phone and I dial Haley's number as the phone is to my ear I pick Brooke up and carefully carry her to my car so I can get her to the hospital I don't think we can wait for an ambulance Haley finally answers once Brooke is in the car.

"Hey Peyton" Haley says

"Hey um Hales I need you to meet me at the hospital I found Brooke but not in a good state. I think she swallowed a bottle of pills and I know she cut her wrist but I don't know how long ago this was. When I got to her she was talking a little but then she passed out I'm on my way right now…" I say crying

"Oh god…Okay we are on our way" Haley says

Once I gets off the phone with Haley I rush to the hospital and open my door and get out then I get Brooke out of the car and carry her into the hospital trying to get someone's attention.

"Can someone please help me" I scream right away three doctors came rushing at me

"What happened to her do you know?" one of them asks while the other two take her and bring her behind doors.

"I'm pretty sure she took a bottle of pills and I know she cut her wrist. When I found her she was able to talk a lot but then she passed out. Is she going to be okay?" I ask

"She should be we will do everything we can for her but you have to stay out here for now" The doctor says.

***~*~***

**A/N: Well that's chapter two I hope you guys liked it. So not a lot of people answered about how Peyton is going to find out about Brooke loving her so far I have two votes for her finding her journal. But if you haven't voiced your opion please do because it won't happen till about the 5****th**** chapter so you still have time here are the choices:**

**Nathan gives Peyton Brooke journal and tells her to read it because he can't watch Peyton hurt Brooke this much anymore**

**Nate just flat out tells her**

**Haley tells her**

**Peyton finds Brooke's journal open while she is sleeping open and it catches her eyes so she read it**

**Please let me know or if you have other ideas. And please don't be afraid to tell me what you hated about my story and how I can improve on it.**


	4. 72 Hour Hold

**Secret Love Since 13**

**Chapter 3: 72 hour hold**

**Brooke's POV:**

I have no idea where I am right now but I have a pretty good idea. The last thing I remember is seeing Peyton and hearing her tell me that I need to keep talk and stay awake but that's the last thing I remember. I know for a fact right now I am laying down and I and hear a bunch of beeping noises so I open my eyes but it's really hard to keep them open. I had them open long enough to see that I'm hooked up to a lot of different machines and Haley, Peyton, Nathan, and Cheska are all in my room but as soon as I saw all of that I had to close my eyes. I hear Peyton, Haley and Cheska talking and I can hear every single word.

"Haley will you please tell me what's going on with Brooke and why she did this?" I hear Peyton ask and really hope Haley doesn't tell her

"Peyton I honestly can't tell you why she did this it would break the trust she has in me and we know how hard it is for her to trust people…But when Brooke is ready I know she will tell you just be patient" I hear Haley say thanking god that she didn't tell her

"When she wakes up you guys do realize they are going to be moving her to the mental hospital on a 72 hour hold right?" I hear Cheska ask them I freak out at this in my brain I will refuse to go!

"Yeah but I also know that Brooke is going to put up one hell of a fight" I hear Peyton say

"Yeah she is" I hear Haley agree

"I agree with both of you but they aren't going to let her off the hook, not only did she cut herself she also swallowed a bottle of pills" I hear Cheska say

"I think when Brooke wakes up she's only going to want to talk to Haley and the reason I think this is because she was at her counseling session today so she knows what's going on better than we do." I hear Nathan speak for the first time

"Yeah I know that" I hear Peyton say

I slowly try to open my eyes again. This time it actually worked too. Once I had my eyes open and I saw everyone I opened my mouth to speak but it came out really horse. Haley turns around and sees that I am awake. She walks over to my bed and grabs a hold of my hand and starts talking.

"Hey tigger you scared me, I'm so glad you are awake" Haley says

"I-I'm sorry" I whisper as I start to cry

"Sweetie its okay" Haley says while rubbing my hair in a comforting way

"Hales can I talk to you alone" I whisper through my tears

"Of course you can sweetie" She says while she moves her hand letting everyone else know that they need to leave

"What did you want to talk about Brooke" She asks with concern in her voice

"I-I don't know what I was thinking I honestly didn't want to kill myself I just wanted to escape from this hell I call life" I say in between sobs

"I know Bee and I promise you when you're able to go home I'll help you any way I can" She says as she climbs up on the bed next to me and wraps me in her arms

"Thanks…I'm really scared of what's going to happen when Cheska reports what my dad has been doing…I can't believe I let her find out my dad's going to kill me, I can't go back home I just wish I had a different life." I explain

"Brooke Cheska and I will make sure that nothing will happen to you once you are able to go home…I won't let you go to your house you can stay with me and Nathan or you can probably stay with Peyton" She reassures me

"Okay, Hales I'm tired but can you please stay with me?" I ask her

"Of course I can sweetie but someone's going to come in here soon and take you to the mental hospital on suicide watch for 72 hours" She explains

"I don't want to go but it that's what I have to do then I will" I said

With that said I fell asleep while Haley was still holding me. I felt so safe in her arms.

**A/N: Here is chapter 3 I hope you liked it and I'm really sorry that it was short and took a long time. Well please tell me what you thought and if you have any ideas please let me know thanks. Also Peyton is going to find out about Brooke like's her next chapter so that's always something to look forward to.**


End file.
